I was in AA enough years to know about helping & helping too much. But for my own personal rationalizations, I went "to any lengths" & beyond for a loser.
I had went from having 2 & 1/2 houses, 2 Harleys, a Dragsster & Stock Car, several "girlfriends", all the booze & drugs,plus one steady Sugar MaMa, to sleeping in the front of an El Camino w/ my Panhead in pieces in back and a Functional, Bipolar old Bag as my "Pain-in-the-Royal-Ass." That took nearly four years. since the death of my Spirit of Life. My Mother.
She was a believer in any recovery and only saw me sober once since 1969. She died in 1986. I finally got "sober" in Sept. of 1990. And that is where I started to live with the bad more than the good.
My friends from growing up, fighting in, Nam, crashing & burning once I made it "home" are still a much better lot than I ever met in AA for many reasons. The first being is that 10s of thousands of dollars passed between us and there was never a dime unaccounted for. What made this possible was some macho fear, but most of all, a sincere will to see everybody get ahead. And when I came to AA, I was lead to believe that I could trust even more the unconditional "love" and the honesty of the ones I were to be involved with. Well…, What a crock that was & is.
I had many a success story while in AA by pulling myself out of the dumps, friends putting me to work for them & not being a letdown, gaining trust & keeping it, & getting a loan and always paying it back. The fact remained, I kept my word,(which was my bond) just like I did on the streets and with my Step-Fathers friends who were full blooded Italians, if you know what I mean. My code of ethics was well ingrained for many years.
I had gotten first in, Mass. while riding with a crew then relapsed. It disappointed them, so I moved on because of legal trouble & ended up in, New Jersey, with a women that had connections, was a functional drunk, and a full-breed man abuser. I used to be her "bouncer" when we first. And I always upheld a code set forth by my Mother & my Oldest Brother. Don't ever touch a women. And it was when I went to really want to hurt her (& still didn't) that I hit my bottom.
I left her after a short time because of her jealousy of my AA friends. I dated around, met a beautiful Redhead who introduced me to Sex Addicts Anonymous. What fun that was. Since then, a lot has gone on and I have already put one horror story in this site. This one is just another story of the unaccountability & irrational behavior that AA allows because of it's Spirituality, Steps, Traditions, and total lack of BALLS.
A Fatboy still in rehab came to me & said he wanted what I had. I was not impressed by him what so ever, but I took a liking to him.
After years of struggling to "make it" with a psychotic bitch who thought she was entitled to everything from the twisted crap she got from a "double-winner" sponsor and those demented Women's Meetings she went to, I had aquired a nice home. cars, credit, & cash always in my pocket. This Fatboy wanted me to show him how to get it. So i started out by giving him a small loan and he proceeded to screw it up. But not by himself. He had gotten himself a Bipolar "bitch" that out-weighed him by more than a 150lbs. She was insecure at about 460 & he was at least 350. What a combo.
In the course of time, he had gotten a traffic warning for no license and needed another loan from me to get it back. And as a drunk will do, he only followed that 1/2 way thru. He then got caught & arrested and now his Dad had to bail out this one. And as fate would have it, he forgot about his payment to me. Now for some of the reasons why he couldn't pay.
The fat bum had an OK job w/ OT and the Really Fat Fiance now was too Bipolar & inept to do anything but watch Soap Operas & talk on the phone all day. So, between her & and a little mut they could not afford, her circus clown looking daughter who drags in anything off the streets to sleep with on the living room floor, this boy couldn't find his pockets to pay me a dime.(Plus he got fired for taking photos for the Internet Email of a 15 year old girl for her boyfriend they was in prison. The mother was the manager of where he was a cook at. The fatbot that is.) Meanwhile, there are sooo many assholes sympathizing with him & his inability to pay his debts, that no matter how I ask, beg, or plea for my money I need to support 2 kids, I'm not getting it.
The drivers license I helped him to get is suspended because of his hazardous driving has now put me on hold for my payment. (How is that?) OK'd by elders who say I have enough time to handle it. WHO the hell are they???
Now after 3 court appearences I am about to make it a fourth. But before that I will garnish his wages and put a lien on anything he or his fatlady owns. And he owes more than just the initial judgment. There are court costs & more he doesn't have the simple mind to realize. And to think this started because he wouldn't pay just $10.
Thank his HP it isn't the old days. But this is just the price that is paid sometimes by "giving it away to keep it" of just helping out another member & relying on AA's Faith that is everywhere, if you believe that.
In other words, this is the price you pay for good "fellowship."